A while back I discussed the Price of Perfection, as it related to my writing goals. Writing that post reminded me once more to find ways each day to reconnect with my passion for writing and for life if I want to achieve my goals. I have never been one to spend my time obsessing about my goals but it is important to internalize goals if we are to have any chance of achieving them.
You’re probably motivated by fear of failure
Without clearly defined goals I can guarantee you one thing. You are just as likely to achieve what you value as goals as you are to achieve what you don’t. That’s a 50% chance of failure right off the bat. Now I see you looking at me with pleading eyes, “please Michael can’t the glass be half full” I hear you cry. Ok for you I’m going to make the glass half full … Except now that I think about it, one of those thick books on my bookshelf is on NLP. Would you believe me if i told you that 9 out 10 people reading this post are motivated by what they don’t want not by what they do want and value. We are very literally running on auto-pilot away from our goals. The problem is all our goals and everything we value is on the far side of that mountain of fear and self loathing not in the other direction.

Your fear is your fuel
I see I’ve got you thinking now. To those shaking their fist at me, no I’m not a quack, in fact stay behind after class I have a note for your mother. The proof, as one of my best friend reminds me so often, is in the pudding. The majority of people on the planet today are living lives that are less than or equal to mediocre. Your life probably has a fair sprinkling of mediocre in it too. When you are not connected to your goals you are probably connected to your fears. Your fears are feeding your mediocrity, keeping your goals at arms length.
Passion is about values not value
It’s not about your bank balance, car or your salary. Mediocre is about how well you are living. How closely your life, goals and your values are aligned. How proud are you when you speak about who you are, not about what you have? Any Yahoo with enough money can buy a shiny BMW. Only you can live a life that allows you to sleep soundly at night with a faint smile. Only you can figure out how to fall asleep secure in the knowledge that today you exercised your purpose achieved your goals on this planet and added value to the world.
These are some of the best ways I’ve found to integrate my goals with my life:
Spend at least 5 minutes a day dreaming
This tip is the most fun on the list, for each goal you are working toward spend part of your 5 minutes visualizing what achieving that goal will look like, smell, like, feel, sound like and what it will taste like. The more senses you call upon the better. Visualizing helps to make this possible future and achieved goals more real. Only when your dreams and goals exist in your minds eye completed and achieved will your body start taking the many steps toward them.
Leave yourself visual reminders of your goals
Put up post it notes with your goals on them. Write your goals in the margins or inside covers of your notebooks. Send yourself future dated e-mail reminding yourself to focus on your goals. Get software get posters get crayons if you want just get creative with remembering your goals. The only way these reminders of your goals will work is if they can knock you out of our stupor during your normal work day.
Tell your friends
Speak about your passions and goals often. Tell your friends tell strangers tell your cat. The more you involve other people the more committed you force yourself to be to your goals. All the poor people you tell will become walking breathing reminders of your commitment to your goals and the fact that your name is on the line. Always remember though your goals are for you. So use the livestock around your cubicles and the love of your friends and family to your advantage for a change.
Research success
Spend your free time reading about people who exhibit the values you wish to have. Find people who have succeed in areas you desire success. The exercise will teach you how how it’s done also you’ll learn from the mistakes from others. The most powerful lesson I take from research is that it is possible. How empowering is that statement? It is possible! As soon as you allow that thought into your life a lot of excuses disappear like manure in the sun.
The only way to achieve your dreams is to live your goals. Use these techniques and any others you come across to incorporate your goals in your living.
See also: How to use Evernote and GTD for setting and achieving goals and objectives
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It’s not enough that we do our best; sometimes we have to do what’s required. Sir Winston Churchill (1874 – 1965)
How great is that quote? It’s something I touched on in my post Try is nothing, do or do not as well. I often wonder what our community fascination is with celebrating giving up. Failure is not the end of the world, it’s not even the end of the road. Until we stop trying, we’re still in the race. Continue reading »
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So as I sit back in my swivelly chair the smell of coffee filling my nostrils, I’m too scared to reach across and pick the damn cup up. Each time I do I get 2 dozen bolts of pain shooting back and forth across my chest and head. Thursday evening I was elbowed in the chest, a blow that through my protective vest felt like a baseball bat hitting me in the sternum. I took a finger to the face and knuckle to the lip. What a great evening.
This was my first evening of Wing tsun class and I’m really glad I went but as it always happens there was a moment earlier in the evening that could have saved me this ordeal.
Having screwed up the directions to my first kung fu lesson, I sat in my car with my phone in my hand considering my options. My mind was set on going home the moment it realized that I was in the wrong place. I had my out, the reason to go back to the comfort of my flat and climb back behind my monitor. I could always try again next week. I knew I was lying to myself. “If not now then when?” that question is the one that came to me at that moment. If not now, when? Continue reading »
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Heading into the end of the year I’m tempted to take stock of my failures in 2009 and start waving my finger at myself for all the things I’ve let slip during the year. All the failures punctuating the months from January to now. I’m reminded of all the doe-eyed dreams I had 12 months ago, and all the many goals I set myself at the beginning of the year. All those failures. I can’t help but smile. The year is however come and gone, no matter how long I wag my finger no matter how down I get this is the present I have inherited from myself, failures and all. In many respects 2009 has been, as my footballing friends would say, a rebuilding year for me. I’ve taken stock of myself and realized a number of things that I possibly wasn’t ready to last year or the year before. Where I am, that is where you’ll find me.
I think I’m going to tattoo that on my forehead this new year. I love the fact that I’ve reached a place in my life where my failures no longer define me. I am free of failure let the success roll in.
Famous Failures:
- Einstein was 4 years old before he could speak.
- Iassc Newton did poorly in grade school and was considered “unpromising.”
- When Thomas Edison was a youngster, his teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything. He was counseled to go into a field where he might succeed by virtue of his pleasant personality.
- F.W. Woolworth got a job in a dry goods store when he was 21, but his boss would not permit him to wait on customers because he “didn’t have enough sense to close a sale.”
- Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.
- Bob Cousy suffered the same fate, but he too is a Hall of Famer.
- A newspaper editor fired Walt Disney because he “lacked imagination and had no original ideas.”
- Winston Churchill failed the 6th grade and had to repeat it because he did not complete the tests that were required for promotion.
- Babe Ruth struck out 1,300 times, a major league record.
Failure quotes:
Failure is an event, never a person. ~William D. Brown, Welcome Stress!
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. ~Thomas Edison
Try again. Fail again. Fail better. ~Samuel Beckett
One fails forward toward success. ~Charles F. Kettering
A man may fall many times, but he won’t be a failure until he says that someone pushed him. ~Elmer G. Letterman
A failure is a man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in the experience. ~Elbert Hubbard
There is much to be said for failure. It is more interesting than success. ~Max Beerbohm,
Mainly on the Air, 1946
The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed. ~Lloyd Jones
If you’re doing your best, you won’t have any time to worry about failure. ~Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
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